So, when I started school back up again, I decided that I should cut back on my coffee consumption, just because I was drinking way too much and it was making me exhausted as hell when I needed to be awake and alert. Well, the transition has been an on and off again experience:
-Good days are not so bad. I have one coffee in the morning and I’m pretty alert, awake etc. By the mid morning I get a little groggy so I decide to eat my lunch to wake me up, which usually does the trick. Then in the afternoon I usually get pretty groggy so I have a hot chocolate and I’m good to go!
-Bad days, like today, are terrible. I wake up, just barely, and saunter over to the shower to have one. I rest my head against the shower wall for about 10 minutes as I attempt to wake up. When I finally am done the whole shower bit, I get out and am blasted by cold air, and go back to my room and get dressed. My iPod chord in my car has died, so I am forced to listen to some shitty CD”s I made when I got my new car. I pull into school and get woken up by the walk to the Riddell center. I grab my coffee and guzzle it down extremely fast. However, this does not help my morning, but I attempt to stave off the temptation (stave it off, 1-2-3, now you can count to 3!). So, by this time I’m pretty pissy and tired as hell, so I grab my lunch and eat it. This helps for about 30 minutes until I’m back to being my normal bitchy self again, so I go to have a hot chocolate. I too guzzle this down, and it also produces the same groggy effect that I’ve been feeling all day. When I get home: NAP TIME, and I nap for an unhealthy length of time.
So, I’ve been searching for ways to combat this tiredness, and the first thing that everyone suggests is eating breakfast.
If you don’t know this about me, I can’t eat foods in the morning anymore (ever since I worked at McDonalds), because I get extremely sick and queasy when I do. However, everyone at school has been buying these Magic Bullets, in which they quickly toss in some fruit and milk etc and away they go! It looks so convienent, so I was thinking about investing in one. However, due to my financial situation, I may have to put this on hold. My mom suggested doing it in our current blender, but then I have no container to put it in once thats done.
Another thing is taking my vitamins (I’m a slacker) and adding iron to the mix.
The problem is is that I get conflicting views on which type of iron to take, because theres ferrous iron, ferric iron, and elemental iron. I’m not sure which one to take, and I’m sort of sketchy on just taking the advice of the people at shoppers drug mart. But if I go into a big fancy vitamin place, it’ll be hardcore overpriced. And if you want my reasons for being scared of overpriced things, see above!
Also, I am so effing busy that I never have time to think about this. Once I’m not busy, I always have something else to do (which I am still behind on!), and I am getting further and further into a rut! A RUT I TELL YOU!
As you can tell I’m extremely stressed. The main reason is ……*drumroll*
DANCING!
And I’ve made myself a decision about it, I’m quitting after this year.
I’ve never had the parents, leah, the dancers treat me so fucking horribly than they did this year. The random hateful e-mails, the whole “yes you teach 4 days, but I’m still going to tell you that your doing shit wrong” mentality, and the fact that my personal life is on display for everyone to see since Cindy fucking Kearns thinks she has the right to tell everyone. I field random e-mails of strait bitching, and “you need to do this” from just about everyone these days, and its time I finally buck up and put a stop to it, for my healths sake.
Yes, my healths sake.
I don’t think I’ve ever been so stressed before like this, and my bodies response? Shut down. It doesn’t function properly, it doesn’t think right, it doesn’t do anything right. I’ve taken off far too much than I can chew this time, and it has to stop.
Another thing is that I have a feeling I wont be here when I’m done my schooling. Jobs will definitely take me other places, and I definitely am not doing my masters here anymore (since the proffessors here aparently don’t think I am smart and work hard), and I”m not just going to say no to any of those opportunities because I’m still teaching, so I have to break free from those bonds and be able to move forward with what I’ve decided to do with my life. I’m sure people will hate me, and think I’m letting them down, but ultimately this is my life, and I’ll do what I want with it.
As you can tell, I’ve been having just about the worst semester ever. I’m falling behind in everything, I can’t bring myself to do homework since I’m a lazy ass, and all I do is play WoW, even though since my guild doesn’t let me raid with them (long weird story) I just sort of sit there and watch people talk in trade chat. Hence, me trying to change my lifestyle. I mean, this sounds a lot like depression, which now that I’m writing all of this is might be, but I haven’t felt that way. I have fun, with Megan and Glee, Dana and Jackie and stuff, so I’m not sure what this is.
And I’d leave you on a happy note, accept I don’t think I have one……..WRONG!
I got a new computer! The monitor is massive, the machine is dead silent, the only thing that sucks is this keyboard is came with. I hate it, but will be buying a new one sooooooon! I was going to take a picture for it today, accept my desk is terribly messy so I wanted to clean it up first. The only bad thing is that our internet router sucks balls, so the internet connection is terrible. This means huge lag spikes when I play WoW, and sometimes my internet goes bonkers too. Oh well, we’ll be looking into it soon (I have a feeling Greg has some weird setting on it that makes all the packets go to his computer only, and not the rest of the houses, which would be super annoying!)
Anywho, I have to go cook supper and jet to dance.
Toodles!


