Decisions

This summer has been the worst summer I have ever had.

It all started with field school.  My best friend ever Mandy had taken a turn for the worst this last semester and started hitting the chronic again.  Now, in highschool I was able to over look this just because everyone did it in highschool.  I didn’t care, it didn’t bother me, but I guess I always assumed once we tossed the caps in the air we would all magically grow up.  Apparently not so. 

So at field school Mandy whipped out her GIANT bag of pot and smoked up every night, if not every day and night.  It even led to her group excavating dinosaur bones in a staked out spot, which means the school is likely never invited to Dinosaur Park again.  Its a real shame, that place was absolutley beautiful.  Well, during this time, I learned a few things:

1) Mandy was stoned while we did our metamorphic project, which explains why I did most of the work.
2) Mandy used me for notes because when she was “sick” she really was just high the night before and didn’t feel like working (from her mouth directly)
3) Apparently I’m lame and don’t know how to have fun.

So I made a decision, to not talk to her ever again.  I’ve made this decision a couple of times, accept everytime I just went back to being her friend.  Well this time was for real, and when we came back to Regina, facebook informed me we were no longer friends, and we didn’t talk to each other when we were right infront of each other.

I think this has been one of the hardest decisions in my lifetime.  She was my best friend, she was there when I had to tell my parents I was gay, when I was depressed about who I was, and everything.  And yet, I just can’t get over the fact that she’s continually used me so she can apparently get a better time out of life.  Everyone else in the geology department knew its what she did, and I guess I was just too innocent to believe my best friend would do this to me. 

And now she’s gone, moved to SFU to finish her geology degree.  And I’ll never have the chance to make things right ever again.  And I don’t know why, but theres that nagging voice in my head telling me to make things right.  But I think now its a little too late, we both have sour feelings towards each other and I think this incident has put the lid on our friendship.

_______

My car broke down this summer, after years of it acting up.  I was a little sad, it was the one last remaining thing I had of my grandfathers.  But there wasn’t much I could do about an old broken down car.  I still have some of his other things, so I’m not too worried about ever forgetting my grandpa.

So I went to go get a new car.  Me and my mom searched high and low on the internet and found, what we thought, was a good deal.  A 2004 echo for 6500.  Well, we checked it out, and all seemed well.  In that moment we bought the car.

Now, I should give credit to my dad, because it will take him literally one month before he buys anything he wants.  I should have done the same.

A couple days later my check engine light comes on, and I go to my friends boyfriend Knoll to have him read the codes.  First, he tells me my idle air sensor is gone, but he figures it shouldn’t be too bad, but he was thinking about how the older idle air sensors and how they worked.  He also pointed out that there was no tube connecting my coolant resevoir to my engine, which means my engine would over heat if I drove it too long. 

So I take it in and explain all these things to the mechanics.  They were very helpful and explained what they needed to do.  They showed me the shitty work that the previous auto body did and what they would need to fix.  They also offered me a courtesy go over of the car!  I was stoked.

Until I saw what they found.

My alternator belt was being shredded, my air filter was full of crap, the body of my car was a mess, among other things.  I tackled them one at a time and finally, after 1500$ of repairs, I had a ok working car.

Because of this, I needed to extend my loan because I wasn’t able to save any money this summer at all.  And now I’m broke, absolutley broke.  I think I can make tuition for this first semester with my own money, but after that its me cruising on my loan.  And who knows what else my car will throw at me this year.

___________

I decided to teach dancing lessons this summer.  And I also discovered what my dance teacher has to put up with, and what I will never put up with in my life ever.

Mothers, that are so single focused on their dancers that they are willing to insult, swear at, and put down other dancers who did absolutley nothing to them ever.  I think its absolutley disgusting, and would seriously like to just shoot them in the face so I would never have to look at them ever again. 

Constant e-mails, text messages, all plotting behind each others backs so that their daughter would come out ontop.  The name calling was horrid, and the politics were even worse.  I just wish I could show them the e-mails that they have sent so that each of them could see what the others have been saying, and then maybe they would just quit the dance studio and my life would be so much better.

I also looked at my dance schedule this year to discover that I’m teaching pretty much the same kids as last year, and I wanted to make it clear to the parents that I was to have no sick children in my lessons, children that were attentive and did what I asked them, and kids that practiced so that they could ATLEAST remember what we did last week.  Am I allowed to?  Of course not!  I have to sit by and take it in stride, and just be patient about it. 

Well you know what?  Fuck that.  I’ve spent hundreds to close to a thousand dollars getting the credentials I have so that I can teach dancing, and I’m not WASTING that money on children who are there to talk with other kids and not do dick all.  If you want to do that, then have a freaking sleep over and curl each others hair. 

And the worst part?  Leah doesn’t care.  She doesn’t care that I have all these ideas and all this talent, and that I’m not allowed to express my standards for when I’m teaching dance.  I have to sit by and just waste 3 hours of my life on kids that just don’t care.  Seriously, its starting to just weigh me down.  Not being allowed to teach premier dancers, not being able to have my own set of dance rules, its just pissing me off.

________

Thank god I get to go back to school to have something to take my mind off of all this crap.

OMGAH

Wow, 4 full months and not one blog.  Thats….messed up.  BUT!  I have an excuse, my plucky canadian friend Megan Tompkins does not!

So, lets start with….school!

This semester was a little rougher than usual.  I was taking 4 classes:

Geology 340 – Stratigraphy: Well it goes without saying that anything that has to do with sedimentary rocks I hate, and this class was no exception.  True, the prof was EXTREMELY nice and knowledgable and it was a complete turn around from my Sed prof, but I just can’t get into it, nor can I find the time to care.  The lab was a series of projects, which started well (95%) and ended poorish (75%).  Over, a lovely 80% in the 30% lab.  Not too bad.  The midterm was stupid, because he gave us true and false, and if it was false we had to correct it.  These types of questions are not my strong point, so I biffed it hard ending in a 70% midterm.  I wrote the final, and it went very well.  I found out that if I get an 80 on the final I get an 80 in the class.  I’m hoping!

Chemistry 330 – Inorganic II (study of transition metals): This class was an awesome class! I learned lots, had a fun time, the assignments were going ok, until BAM! 56% on the midterm.  I was just so tired from that week, and I had a midterm the day before, that I just wasn’t in the zone, and was being retarded.  Then, the labs were not going very well either since Henry Yee is a big giant asshole.  So, I went into the final with about a 60, and if I want a 70 in the class I need 70 on the final.  Well thats a whole other story, that involves me metamorphically taking 4 bats in the butt dry.  The questions were tough, I have no clue if I did them right or not, and am just stressed.  I may have to anticipate lower than a 70, which is really dissapointing because I really do understand the concepts in that class, its just the questions were a little more complex than what I could get from them.  *Sigh*

Geology 471 – Geochemistry: HAHAHAHAHA!  Easy as pie.   I averaged 92 on the labs, a 81 on the midterm with only one hour of studying.  Everyone else was running around all stressed and I think they’re all a silly bunch of morons.  But, then the lab final came, and there wasn’t a single question from our labs actually on it.  His explanation?  He wanted to see if we UNDERSTOOD the equations we were using.  Ugh, suck it Chi!  Then, we had to write papers and do a presentation.  Well I decided to do something he has an entire lab dedicated to, and got a new asshole torn out of me.  So then I write him an email and pretty much say sorry for making a shitty presentation, and he tells me “I thoroughly enjoyed it.”  FUCK YOU BUDDY! If you did, then why did you HUMILIATE me infront of the entire class?  Most of which I am smarter than I might add, and actually picked a topic that solves a geological problem (me and the masters student were the only two people to actually do this).  *Sigh*.  Well then the final came, and I aced it hardcore.  It was so simple, so easy, everything I knew and studied were on there.  Yay!

Geology 315 – Metamorphic Petrology: Well I can’t complain too much about this class, accept that it was kind of a gong show at times.  The department is really cracking down on cheating, and the main advocate of this was our proffessor.  So, she caught people cheating on the midterm (through an answer key she gave out last year, which kind of makes it her fault) and so she adjusted marks and stuff based on that.  That brought me to an 80 on the midterm, the 3rd highest mark in the class.  I could have done better, but my multiple choice were god awful.  I just suck at it sooo bad.  I rocked short answer, which is where I came up with most of my marks, and then did really well on the description of the rock.  I missed a few things, but she said overall I am one of her more promising students.  The labs went fairly well aswell, as when I compared them with the rest of the class they seemed to be doing a lot poorer than I was.  BUT!  There was this lab final.  It was done in pairs, and was more of a lab project final.  The person I got stuck with?  Tracy Putz, a girl who failed every single lab this semester.  So, I did all the work and she wrote things down, and I think we did just fine.  We still haven’t gotten lab marks back yet, but I asked her the other day and she said I was doing just fine.  I haven’t written this final yet, but I am very confident in the material, so I will do just fine.

Apart from all this, I haven’t really done too much, just shit tons of projects and homework.  I’m still teaching dance, and that is always a good time.  Provincials are coming up, so all the teachers and dancers are stressing really bad, and I’m starting to feel it too.

But, on a good note, I GOT A SUMMER JOB!  With the geological survey of Saskatchewan, doing office stuff.  I’m stoked! I was so worried I wouldn’t have a job for the summer, but now I do!

And I would love to talk more, but I’m all blogged out.

Cya!

Oh god ><

 So, like a month later, HI!

Well, judging from my last post I have a lot to fill you in on.  Let the story telling begin!

Finals were all around pretty good, accept for sedimentology.  That one stuck a butt plug in my ear and didn’t stop thrusting for the full 2 hours I spent in there.  However, I apparently did just fine.  Let me recap the final marks, and the marks I got on my finals:

Paleontology: 81 overall, 66 on the final.  Yeah, she definitly put me in the WRONG headspace when she said it was a piece of cake.  I didn’t explain anything in depth and that was my only problem.

Statistics: 92 overall, 95 on the final.  Yeah, not sure what else to say!  I could have had a higher mark if I handed in my last two assignments and done better on the second midterm.

Igneous Petrology: 74 overall, 76 on the final.  Well, this wasn’t a bad mark considering I barely studied and I was getting crappy marks the whole semester.  I did pull out the highest lab final and lab mark in the class though, which was nice.

Sedimentology: 71 overall, 73 on the final.  OMFG! I jumped for JOY when I saw this mark.  From what I hear, its the highest mark in the class.  I don’t want to go around and ask everyone their marks, but I mean it was a sweet mark, and its nice to finally be ontop of something for once.

So for this semester, my average went up one percent.  I’m now at a 73, and hoping that it climbs even higher this semester.  I really think I can pull out top notch marks if I try hard enough.  The only thing that might stop me is me being tired all the time ><

So then christmas came!  I also will not prepare a long list, but I did get pretty much everything I wanted (INCLUDING A WIIIIIII!), so I was very happy.  The one thing I was kind of hoping for was a backpack, because I like the back backpack style, but the one I have is falling apart.  I’ve had it for like 8 years though, so that might be why.  I’m also looking for more of a hiking style one since if I ever do field work I will need one of those.  So, I am trying to save up for one.  Lets see how that plays out!

Phils family also came down…and that was interesting.  I think they sort of drove my mother nuts a little bit, since phils brother apparently doesn’t eat anything accept for kraft dinner and is allergic to our cats, a fact they perhaps should have alerted us to before hand.   But, they did buy me some new ram for my computer, and now it is all spiffy and fast.

Then they left, and I sat on my ass for a week doing nothing but teaching private lessons and playing world of warcraft until 4 in the morning.  God, it was sooo nice. 

And now I’m back to school.  The class line up this semester IS:

Metamorphic petrology – the proffessor has one tone of voice, and its killing me.  Its absolutley killing me.  I sleep every single time.  The nice thing is is that she takes a break half way through, which gives me ample time to run to tim hortons and pump myself full of caffiene.

Geochemistry – as a chemistry major, the introduction to chemistry chapter had me banging my head against a desk.  The only lovely thing is is that when we did the assignment, all the loser geologists confused the hell out of me by trying to do all these weird things, which I then did for some reason, then was told my way of doing it was correct.  The only annoying thing about this class is that I have to dumb down my explanations of things, because they proffessor and the lab TA are both chinese, and don’t understand my lingo.  *sigh*

Stratigraphy – today, I drew a kung fu kirby on my page for 10 minutes.  Enough said.

Inorganic II – if theres a proffessor who can hold my attention, its Dr. M.  He’s amazing, and I am really enjoying this class. I just can’t wait to get into the transition metal coordination stuff, we’re still on introduction.  Yay!

So far everything is going ok.  I am not really remembering anything I am learning though, so thats sort of problematic.  Oh well.

Anywho, I have a lab to start typing up.  I’ll catch up with you guys later!

-Ryan